Not sure if you’ve heard, Folks, but Winter is mf’n HERE. Well, not in Southern California – Southern California is literally Mordor – but most of the continental United States, it’s some kind of chilly holiday season. And that means it’s time for GEEK’s annual Game of Thrones Gift Guide!
We’ve scoured the internet for the GoT Must Haves of 2017, but here at GEEK, we want to make sure the gifts you give and the gifts you receive will score you as many, “Where did you get that?”-s as possible. So, when scouring the entire internet, we tried to hit the fringes a little bit so you’re sure to see a few unique ideas we guarantee you won’t find on any other GoT gift guide.*
*Except for that Olenna t-shirt. It’s everywhere and deservedly so.
We stumbled across these brilliant pieces of fanart at the 2016 San Diego Comic Con. Scott W. Smith is the artist behind this brilliant concept – he composes fandom images entirely out of words associated with the subject. Sometimes he uses single quotes, but for this Lannister piece, he used house words, quotes and the names of Lannister family members to make up a lion, the Lannister sigil. He’s also done the Stark and Targaryen sigils if they’re more your speed. And at $20-ish, they’re extremely affordable. Be sure to check out his website for the long list of other fandoms he’s represented this way.
HOUSE SIGIL CHESS PIECES DECAL – $7.25, Etsy
This decal (which works for any flat surface if you or the recipient don’t want to put it on your computer) is beautifully reminiscent of the four house sigils featured in the opening credits of Game of Thrones. Chess and GoT fans alike would appreciate this subtle nod to the four warring-est houses of Westeros.
THE ONLY 2017 GoT TEES YOU NEED
We got tired of seeing everyone walking around in the same “That’s what I do. I drink and I know things.” shirt, so we combed the internet for some more current designs. These are our top three picks for the more casually clever Thrones fans in your life.
Cersei: Make Westeros Great Again – $20-$30 – @QueenCerseiReal is a Donald Trump parody account on Twitter. Johnny Kolasinski (@cycloptiko) takes President Trump’s tweets and rewrites them in the voice of Queen Cersei Lannister, First of Her Name. He’s subbed out pretty much the entire American political landscape with Westerosi familiar faces, and the effect is nothing short of hilarious. Pick this for that “inside joke” friend.
The North Remembers – $15-17 – The Starks really leaned into this motto during Season 7. Arya kicked things off with the mass murder of all the men in House Frey, the Stark siblings offed Littlefinger in spectacular fashion, and Bran literally remembered that Jon was the heir to the Iron Throne. Pick up this North Face-meets-Tarantino tee for the ride-or-die House Stark fan in your life.
It Was Me – $21 — RIP, Olenna Tyrell, Queen of Burns. Westeros will never see your like again. In all seriousness, if we had to lose Olenna, we’re glad she got to go out on a such a satisfying note. Happily taking a shot of poison before gleefully admitting she was the one who killed Joffrey Baratheon is probably a more badass send-off than any of us can hope for. In honor of what we hope is her epitaph, snag this very accurate portrait of Lady Olenna from Drunk Girl Designs.
HAND OF THE KING TIE CLIP – $30, Etsy
Gentlemen, if you want to know what it feels like to have someone stare at your chest, pick up one of these snazzy, yet subtle Hand of the King tie clips. They come in gold, silver and bronze (gold and silver pictured), and the Etsy shop, SanSanAtelier, also offers matching sets of cufflinks ($35). If you’re looking for something for the Game of Thrones Gentleman in your life, this tie clip or cufflinks or both would make an excellent choice.
HOUSE SIGIL MAKEUP BRUSH SET – $25, Etsy
Fandom-themed makeup brushes are all the rage since Wonder Woman took a break from the Justice League to launch a line of her own. With its own reputation for elegant design, it’s no surprise we’ve seen several Game of Thrones sets pop up. This one from the Treasure Grotto is our favorite. Every major house is represented, and it ships quickly if you’re looking for a last-minute stocking stuffer.
WESTEROS TRANSIT MAP – $15, Etsy
This gorgeous transit map by Fencing & Archery is the perfect postmodern expression of your or your friend’s Game of Thrones fandom. It’s incredibly detailed, meaning it’ll be a wonderful discussion piece whenever like-minded guests pop over and take a few minutes to peer at all the different destinations (which will, in turn, give the recipient the opportunity to show off some obscure knowledge – “What’s Planky Town? Let me explain…”).
It’s also a nice switch from the earth tones most GoT merch favors (for obvious reasons), so if there’s someone in your life that loves Thrones, but can never find anything to match their tastes, consider this poster.
GoT-THEMED PLAYING CARDS – $20, Etsy
Game of Thrones is no stranger to the tabletop game scene. In addition to a few original games, you can find GoT Risk, Clue, Monopoly and even Settlers of Catan. But if the Thrones fan in your life is more into cards than they are board games, this is the perfect gift. Each face card represents a different GoT character and the backs are intricately detailed with skulls and house sigils.
If these don’t quite strike your fancy, JokerandtheThief also makes another deck featuring the Westeros map on the back.
DRAGON’S EGG BOOKMARK – $13.78, Etsy
Do you know a Thrones fan who can’t stop telling people they’ve read all the books? Give them this stunning dragon’s egg bookmark from Spookyisland on Etsy to reward them for their diligence. You can choose between Drogon (Red), Rhaegal (Green) and Viserion (Gold), and you’ll find each has some nice heft – perfect to handle marking a place in one of George R. R. Martin’s 800+ page tomes.
GoT NURSERY PRINTS – $16, Etsy
Introducing kids to Star Trek is easy. Introducing kids to Lord of the Rings is easy. Introducing kids to Game of Thrones is VERY UNADVISABLE. But if you want to make sure your kids grow up with an appreciation for George R. R. Martin and the HBO hit series so they’ll be excited to read it when they come of age, maybe start with a little subliminal decor?
If you have little ones or know a few GoT fans that are expecting, consider these prints from DesignSwiftHome on Etsy. They’re sweet renditions of Game of Thrones sigils and sayings (our favorite’s the Stark Direwolf howling, “Naptime is coming!”) that are appropriate nursery decor. The best part is they’re available for instant high-res download – no waiting! There’s a set of Harry Potter prints, as well, if you have cross-fandom interests and/or friends.
KHALEESI CUFFS – $19.99, Amazon
These stunning dragon earcuffs (for pierced ears) from BlingSoul on Amazon will have anyone who wears them hearing dragons songs. They’re an elegant and tasteful way to rock some GoT bling, and at $19.99 they won’t break your bank. Have a friend who’s still mourning the loss (and unfortunate rebirth) of Viserion? Send them a pair of these so they can offer the proper tribute.
Hopefully, this will ease your gift-buying decisions this year to help you spoil your favorite GoT fan, or yourself. We won’t tell anyone…
Images: Respective suppliers